Month of Celebrating Life: Risk

9. risk

This is another photo of the same convent, though of the other tree, a fir tree, that I took today. When I thought of the word risk the one thing that came to my mind, while I was out riding my bike today, was tree. So I knew that I had to take a picture of a tree. I was on my way to the grocery store and going by the same way that I did yesterday. This tree was just the right image for me to take a photo of today. I love fir trees!

I didn’t even notice the wrong way sign next to the sidewalk until I was downloading the photo. It reminded me of how I pretty much ignore one way streets and bike down wherever I want to go. Being a bicyclist and a pedestrian has meant that I usually do ignore those types of things, while being as safe as possible. Here I am riding on the sidewalk. I go my own way and I am proud of that.

I’ve been thinking about risk a  lot lately. Kind of in prep for today’s photo challenge prompt word. Though I realize that risk and comfort and all that I have been doing in healing since the beginning of this year so far is all about this topic. I was so happy when I saw that Liz had written and posted a post for today’s photo prompt, call me crazy, but I’m risking it. I love this. It contained a lot of what I have been thinking about when it comes to risk, love, life. It’s all about being willing to assess the risks, face them, and take a leap of faith, doing. To me, on my healing path now, everything is about the doing.

In January, when I was feeling very sad and lonely about wanting more friendship of every kind and more depth and time to them, I had a chat with my blog friend David. He told me something that I remind myself of all the time. David said, “the ones who keep reaching…they find.” I really need to remind myself of this all the time.

It takes so much pain and sorrow out of my life right now, because I choose to believe it and to act as though my life is going to change for the better when it comes to my future; for tomorrow, next week, next month, and next year. It helps me to believe in something more for myself, no matter what is going on. It helps me to be positive and to keep reaching out, for my life, for my moments, for my interactions with others, for my moments with myself. It helps me to believe, even when there is no evidence that someone is reaching back or ever will in face to face interactions, it helps me to keep reaching.

But the truth is that so much has changed since January. I have gotten so many new blog friends and more interactions with blog friends I already had. It has been amazing. I love it so much. I used to question when that would happen, when someone would love me and want me. I don’t ask myself that question anymore. I already have friends that love and want me.

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