Sometimes the biggest leaps in healing are so hard to put into words and to describe. It’s because they are so small in comparison to how many words it takes to talk about them, small as an atom and about as powerful. The words just seem to go on and on. I’ve been talking about my most recent leap in healing and I just keep talking about it, saying the same things over and over.
What I know is that the healing work I have been doing in the last few months are why I have had this leap in healing. Working on connectedness, practicing being calm and assertive (advice from The Dog Whisperer on how to approach life, to be a good pack leader, and to be a good dog owner), understanding the impact of self-pity being an inferior message to myself and that sorrow about my life was drowning me in sorrow rather than joy and healing and being willing to abandon those practices in my daily life, imagining myself wearing an invisible magical cape before I go out in public thanks to an idea from my friend Granny at the blog The Village Granny from her blog post The Magic Capes, my connectenedness to other survivors and other survivors blogs and being able to remind myself all the good and loving things that they say to me and about me, writing and posting about a sexually abusive relationship while being an adult on my blog, continuing to take a real hard look at the impact of verbal and emotional abuses and their aftermath in my adult life, and continuing to work on self-care and bliss have all made a huge impression on my life and healing lately.
My really huge leap in healing is that I am finally making a huge dent in my previously unconscious negative beliefs about myself. They aren’t unconscious anymore. Now I recall those who abused me implanting these messages long ago.
I have seen behind the curtain like Dorothy does in the Wizard of Oz and like her I see that once I see the truth I don’t have to believe in the omnipotence of those who would use and abuse me to their own purposes. Even if everyone in the world agreed with them, I don’t have to agree with them.
I was once tiny and vulnerable to them, no more. For behind there are abusers who are telling me to ignore them, that I am truly inferior and unworthy, and I see that they are really talking about themselves and not me. I don’t believe them anymore.
Each day, I am sure, will bring up more messages that I will get the opportunity to refute and to tell myself a new message, one of love, acceptance, wholeness, and healing, ones that I now believe in when I tell myself them. It’s going to be pretty exciting.
Yeah Kate! Save your fork! The best of life is still ahead! Like the fine dessert hidden in the kitchen and ready to be brought to the dining table. Look forward to it. Be ready. Save your fork!
Granny
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Hi Granny,
Thanks so much for your inspirational words. Good and healing thoughts to you.
Kate
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What Granny said. This is so, so great, Kate!! I’m doing a lil happy dance for you!! 🙂
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Hi Kerro,
Thank you sweet heart. Thanks for the happy dance too. 🙂
Good and healing thoughts to you.
Kate
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That sounds wonderful, Kate. I’m glad you are experiencing this. I hope you’ll experience the world differently too (well, I suppose I more precisely mean the way in which you relate to the world)! Go you!
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Thank you. I hope so too. 🙂
Good and healing thoughts to you.
Kate
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You are inspiring! I want a magic cape!!! Also, an invisibility cloak so the rest of me can be invisible with my pain!!
You are soooo good to yourself, you deserve it! I want to be like that.
🙂
IP
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Hi IP,
Thanks so much. I think that eventually I might have to make a real magic cape, just so I can remind myself what it really looks like. Granny has an explanation on how to make them through the link. OH, invisible with my pain, that sounds great. I would like to put your name on my daily Reiki distance healing list, if that would be alright with you. Let me know.
I hope that there is something that you can do every day to take good care of yourself. Practice makes perfect, they say, and I am far from perfect yet, but will keep working at it.
🙂
Good and healing thoughts to you.
Kate
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Good for you Katie! I soooo understand the process, and struggle not to let myself get sucked back into the little voice telling me I’m not good enough.
You keep your chin up and keep wearing Granny’s invisible cape.
Sharon
http://sharon-moms-madhouse.com/
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Hi Sharon,
Yes, that little voice, I know it well. There is another little voice inside as well, the one that says truth, the more we can listen to it, honor it and act on it, the stronger and louder the little voice of truth gets.
I am going out tonight so really needed the reminder to wear my cape. Thanks for the reminder.
Good and healing thoughts to you.
Kate
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