14 thoughts on “Songs for Self(ves) 31

    • Hi Elle,

      I love this song. I imagine that our system is all around us, in a circle. I imagine us feeling the way the song lyrics go and then us being there for each other. And that we are loving and caring for one another.

      Because breathing was something that my mother often interfered with and because I have so many problems with breathing and because it is so triggering, I chose this song to help us focus on healing and healing our breath.

      To us it has a melancholy way about it, but through the thoughts and meaning we give the song and how we unite together in our struggle of healing while listening and singing along, it is a very healing song. Because though I need so much and want so much, we can be there for one another and make our life one of communion, rather than sad and empty.

      Good and healing thoughts to you.



      • Hi Kate,

        Your comment about breathing struck a chord with me. Breathing, or maybe I should say not breathing, can be triggering for me, too. I have asthma and there were many situations when I couldn’t breathe or my inhaler was kept from me until I cooperated. People have tried to get me to do breathing exercises and I just can’t. Like it does the opposite of relaxing me.

        Anyway, I like the idea of being surrounded and protected by my system.



      • Hi Elle,

        I’m so sorry you went through that. I know exactly how that feels. I was recently going through all the books that I own and deciding whether to keep them or not. One book I really was interested in keeping, but looking through it, it is just breathing exercises and that was triggering me just by looking at it. It will get donated instead, hopefully to someone who can use it.

        Do you have anything to focus on when breathing is a problem? I use a stone or a small doll or stuffed animal. When in public I sometimes think of one of my animal guides and focus on them. The essential oils are easier for me to hold in because combined with the air, it feels thicker and that is easier for me to hold in longer and easier for me to blow the breath out.

        Good and healing thoughts to you.



  1. This is a powerful song. It has always personally evoked some CSA emotions, and importantly it feels like it touches on feelings concerning SI in the aftermath.

    I can appreciate it as an inspirational song though and not a trigger. I hope (and read) this is a healing song to you as well.

    Take good care,
    atria http://www.butterflyclosures.com


    • Hi Atria,

      Yes I understand the song as someone who is dealing with the aftereffects of some kind of abuse, and is doing less than healthy coping measures.

      For me, using the song as a healing message within my DID system, I see the song as a positive thing, even though I hear the sadness there as well. The sadness works, because survivors definitely know what living with sadness is really like. There was a time when I gravitated to sad love songs and that was not helpful or healing and focusing on them was something that made me feel sad and sustained that sadness for hours or days. At a certain point I had to avoid those kinds of songs.

      I know there are some songs others find healing that don’t work for me. It is my hope that if some of my songs don’t work for someone else, it might cause them to think about what type of songs do work for them and seek out some more. Good and healing thoughts to you.




  2. I love this song and I love Sia. Haven’t thought about this deeply before but god, It feels like it was written just for me.


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