My Poetry

Down to the Zero of Myself

(2009)

for Eve Ensler
(writer/creator of “The Vagina Monologues,” “The Good Body,” V-Day, an international effort to stop violence against women, and a survivor of physical violence by her father.

Based on a piece called “Down to the Zero of Myself” from the book “Insecure at Last” by Eve Ensler.

down to the zero of myself
here all alone
abandoned
somewhere on the road

you are
in the depths of emptiness
as it washes and breaks
over you
lost, unremembered
no existence
down to the zero

reduced by your father
to zero,
his hands, his fists
his belt, his words
down to the shame
down to the emptiness
inside you
down to the zero

the huge inner room
gapes and yawns
to swallow you
into the inner reality,
a terrible place

all the things you did
all you were willing to do
to change, to fill it
nothing changed
it would not go away

until

now
swimming at last,
in the center

swimming at last
in the center
of your soul,
beautiful.

~ Kate

7 thoughts on “My Poetry

  1. Wow. I am completely, truly blown away, Kate. This speaks so much to me. I can relate to some of these feelings so much. “Down to the Zero!” What a perfect way to express what I’ve felt as being reduced to less than human. Wow! Perfect!

    And, BTW, I LOVE Eve Ensler!

    Like

    • Hi Marj,

      I wish that I could claim that I came up with the phrase, but it is in the piece that she writes about her experiences, in her book. It is in the piece mentioned at the top of the poem, in the dedication.

      I love her too. One of my favorite parts in her body book is the phrase, I eat this ice cream for all women! It gets me all excited when I think of it. She brings healing and I like to see people who are healers.

      Good and healing thoughts to you.

      Kate

      Like

    • Hi!

      Thanks so much. This is one of my favorite poems, that I have written, because it is for Eve, who has inspired me with her life, her work, and her life, and who has made the life of women, men, and children better.

      If you read the piece in her book that this poem is based on, you will see that the ideas are really hers, putting her experiences into a form for a poem and my awe, those are mine.

      Good and healing thoughts to you and your blog.

      Kate

      Like

  2. Pingback: Down to the Zero of Myself | Artists4Peace

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